When you know, you know.
I wish I could tell myself that 10 years ago…heck longer…maybe 20!
For years I have searched for “What I wanna be when I grow up.” And through that journey, half of it ended up online via social media. I have started so many “ventures” in the hopes it was “the one.” Meaning, hoping it was my lifes calling. I am sure it looked like I was pushing for sales, broke and desperate, or a complete mess. (probably all of the above) I am SURE that I have lost Facebook friends over it. I have started websites, blogs, portfolios all over the web featuring some new “money making scheme” that typically would burn out in a few months or less.
The thing is, it wasn’t ever all of the above, I was in search of my calling. My hearts desire. My purpose. Why had God put me here? I needed validation and I needed a reason.
Freelance designer, Illustrator, Children’s illustrator, Portrait artist, Pet portrait artist, Dog sitter, Art teacher, Product and packaging designer, Invitation designer, brand designer, Social media expert, Etsy expert, Web designer. I made note cards, name cards, invitations. I made my own packaging. I walked from door to door selling my services. I placed ads and registered on Google.
I could go on and on…
I have notebooks and folders and binders full of ideas and concepts. Believe it or not, not all of them saw the light of day. I also enjoyed the entrepreneurial aspects. I loved thinking of business names and creating branding and envisioning the future. So much so, I did it for over a decade.
I love design, but I didn’t LOVE love it. It doesn’t make my heart sing. I loved teaching, but I didn’t LOVE love it. Do you see where I am going here?
Well, I’m done.
I no longer need to make a business or push any ideas. I have known all along what was truly in my heart. I love to draw. Specifically I love to draw with ink. My calling…my heart’s want…is in my art. It’s my soul speaking to another. It always has been.
I don’t know what changed exactly, but I have no need to be validated by it or to make money with it anymore. I want to MAKE. I want to CREATE.
There will be no business cards or ads or promotional posts. I’ll share what I am making and that’s it. Hope you enjoy. 🙂